Hi Ya Kid! Long time, no bark! Listen, you know me, I'm busier than the fleas on my backside...just can't catch a break! Patrolling the manse 24/7 against invading rodents is a full time job! And believe you me, the Human is no help on this front! Not once has she offered to go on patrol with me! But do not worry about me kid, I'm tough as a petrified Snausage, and lately I've had more pressing issues than rodents! Let me show you...
And as you may remember, when my niece and nephew come to visit, who is it that is sent to the Dog House?!? Yes, Yours Truly! Those two get away with MURDER and I get banished! Oh well, such is the life of a guard dog!
Now kid, don't get me wrong, it ain't all bad...once the niece left things got back to normal - the Human was back to mauling me, telling me how precious I am, how much she loves me, blah, blah, blah...and a well placed snarl from me let her know I am only willing to tolerate so much! She apologized by letting me have one of her Halloween quilts...and then, because she is human and doesn't fully understand the laws of nature...she tried to take it back...Hahahahaha...as if that was possible! No one touches my quilts...NO ONE!
Alright kid - time for me to take a little siesta before the next monsoon arrives. Thanks for checking in, and remember this, 'cause it's truer than the Bible at a revival...DOG'S RULE!